The crowd has turned on Gerry - even Jesse is visibly wincing. In the studio, a shocked murmur runs through the audience. He only shakes his head, referring vaguely to the “tough decision ahead” … and then kisses her good-bye? What? What is happening? Put this relationship out of its misery, dude. “Is there something you want to tell me?” she asks. But while it’s painfully obvious what direction Gerry is going in, he just can’t muster up the nerve to deliver the final blow - even at Leslie’s urging. If it looks like a breakup, swims like a breakup, and quacks like a breakup, then … it probably is a breakup. “Be happy,” he tells her, and I can feel my blood pressure rise in real time. “It’s been so much fun … thanks for everything you’ve done,” he says, sounding like an HR rep in the middle of laying you off. Gerry segues into a speech that sure feels like he’s dumping Leslie. “I can feel it,” he begins to say but trails off. She tells him she loves him “very, very much.” His response? “That’s such a special sentiment.” I am fairly certain that, according to the Geneva Conventions, this technically constitutes a war crime. Then the evening takes an excruciating turn. Nevertheless, that night, she presents him with a book full of photos and other mementos from their relationship - with plenty of pages left blank at the end. Leslie sensed he wasn’t “quite himself,” quite possibly because he is being, again, I repeat, so, so weird. If you’re ever playing poker with Gerry and he starts repeating, “Okay? All right,” you’re going to want to go all in. “Okay? All right,” he keeps saying, while seemingly trying to extricate himself from the interaction as soon as possible. Once Leslie wraps up with the fam and it’s just the two of them, the Gatch proceeds to get weird. Leslie hits it off with both generations of the family, who are taken with her free-spirited energy and her humor - she recounts that a highlight of the overnight date was when she heard him say “fuck” for the first time and was relieved that she finally felt like she could swear in front of him. Two thumbs-up!īut what does Leslie have to worry about? As she recalls it, in the fantasy suite, he told her she was the one. This is all systems go, as far as Gerry’s daughters are concerned. She describes her 42-year marriage to her late high-school sweetheart, and everyone gets teary over their shared understanding of grief. When she meets the family, Theresa recounts the frosting lips incident, which probably wasn’t strictly necessary, given that image has already been char-grilled into my personal retinas and I don’t share DNA with either party involved. Gerry describes Theresa to them as a “professional businesswoman,” which is (a) possibly evidence that he still does not totally remember what she does, and (b) the kind of thing a second-grader says they want to be when they grow up. The Gatch’s daughters, Jenny and Angie (who looks so much like her dad that I momentarily considered whether she was really him in disguise, trying to get an undercover scoop on Theresa and Leslie’s true feelings), and granddaughters are on hand to vet the finalists. But I didn’t imagine just how gnarly it would get. Given that Gerry has essentially signed a You Are My Soul Mate contract in blood (and a No, With You I Really Mean It addendum) with both Leslie and Theresa, we knew going into tonight that, whatever happens, it wasn’t going to be easy. He’s not coming out smelling like roses the bloom is off the rose yada, yada, rose, yada, yada, thorns, yada, yada. It will not! It turns out that Gerry managed to pull off a pretty serious heel turn all on his own. You may be wondering, as I was: Will tonight’s (live!) finale address these allegations? On Wednesday, The Hollywood Reporter published an exposé on Gerry Turner that suggests he’s framed his post-marriage dating life misleadingly on television, quoting a former live-in girlfriend who says they started dating just a month after his wife died and that the future Golden Bachelor criticized her for gaining weight, among other not-so-flattering details.
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